This year.

This January 1st is really only symbolic for change in our little family because the arrival of our sweet bundle on November 7th was really the reset button on life as we knew it. We already love it so much and couldn't imagine it any other way. 

The very beginning of the year is always a great point for reflection though and this one is no different. 

For many, 2016 was a difficult year. Certainly for our nation as a whole it was tumultuous. And I've had my fair share of those. Certain battles I've fought, I've been able to share either on social media or with friends and family privately and I found much comfort. This is difficult for me - I don't share raw personal details with ease. It takes a considerable effort to put myself out there. And sometimes I'm not able to share and I suffer alone for fear of many things - judgement, highlighting weakness, or appearing to seek attention. 

But the struggles I have shared have had their burdens lessened. My load has felt lighter. Others have shared their troubles and we find camaraderie in our pain. My gratitude for this cannot be measured. 

2016 was for me a monumental year for nearly all positive reasons. I have found a peace in my heart that has never dwelled there before. I've found healing. I've found strength in myself and my support system. I'm still learning to let go. I'm still learning to hold on tight. I'm learning to face fear and stand strong.  

Oddly enough - I found it harder to share my triumphs this year than I did to share my struggles. It's a hard balance to strike to turn a conversation in your direction and shine light on an accomplishment or moment of joy and not seem boastful. To not dismiss another's speed bump by shouting from the top of my recently conquered mountain. I hate to minimize someone else's sadness or frustration by smiling so big my face cannot contain it. 

But so many things have lit up my face this year. The most beautiful love. A new home and community. The opportunity to stay at home with our daughter full time. Welcoming Samantha into our lives and becoming a mother - a lifelong dream. Good health. A happy heart. A strong soul. 

It's not all perfect, it never is. But I want to strive to be both. Always both. Authentic. I'm going to share my baby pictures with reckless abandon. I'm going to celebrate every mile I run and each yoga pose I strike. And I'm going to cheer on your highlights as well so that we can all rejoice in the good we find.

I won't be jealous because your hair looks better than mine, because your vacations looked too fabulous, or because your marriage, friendship, or job look happier than where I'm at. 

So there it is I guess - my word for this year is CELEBRATE! Each moment, every accomplishment, all of the good times to be had. Let's do this, friends. Let's enjoy every moment we can.